A couple weeks ago, Alice had the chance to meet with a representative from a New York modeling agency. She chose to go to to movies with her friends. Thank Heavens.
Considering that she’s only a junior in high school I couldn’t see the point of it anyway. And from what I’ve heard and read, it’s not a very positive environment. But I appreciated her priority to focus on the familiar, the known and the normal than to seek bigger things.
Recently I’ve encountered families and friends whose kids have not had such normal lives. In one case national, sustained exposure on a national television show; in another, cancer at an early age (perhaps we can put them at both ends of the range in my geeky image of a normal distribution). Extreme situations to be sure, and rare (in the latter case, not rare enough). In the first case, a situation sought for and won and seeing where the ride goes. In the other, a tragic situation that calls on every possible resource to endure. In both cases, off the normal path, a loss of control and independence, “opportunities for growth,” with hopefully only positive outcomes.
I’ve decided that normal is just fine, thank you. There are plenty of opportunities for growth and for learning, ways to find excitement and have our strengths and assets challenged, without going to such extremes. This semester I encountered a situation that consumed a significant amount of time over two weeks and that remains unresolved, around which I heard words like ‘pioneer’ and ‘everyone will benefit from what you are learning…” to put a positive spin on the effort involved in dealing with the issue. Maybe it’s my age and a lifetime of facing minor adversities and new experiences head on and with optimism, but I say, nuts to that.
There’s a lot to be said about the value of normal and average, because even within that there are peaks and valleys and ‘opportunities for growth.’ Sure a little excitement is good; ego boosts and surprise events; speed bumps and guard rails. But for Alice, specifically, I am thrilled that this modeling thing (or the ballet thing, or the tennis thing, or the writing thing, or the art thing) are in the realm of normal. It’s not to deny her opportunities (which is what much of this modeling venture has been) but for now, for her learning and growth, I am – and I think she is – happy with normal.

Another Halloween has passed. Let’s put this one in the ‘underwhelming’ category.
When your little and you imagine being a parent, mostly you think of cuddling a little baby.
So my understanding of how teenagers have looked for prospective colleges is rather dated.
Here’s another thing I love about my daughter: she’s not too old to write a fan letter to a favorite author.
Only a week has past
Few things thrill me as much as seeing young women doing ballsy, great things with their natural talents and ambition.
expected an old auditorium.
What is absorbing my waking moments, what I would talk about if we met on the street, is not what I want to write about. It’s something with work and my best analogy is this: it feels like I’m driving on ice – at night – on a very long, unfamiliar road.